Gumball
by EvelioandZgroup
Summary: Do you want a series that answers questions you have for the show? Like, for example, if your favorite shipping becomes real? If life is happily ever after? Answers to all of your questions? Well, this doesn't have it. In fact, this series is about nothing. We answer none of your questions. Now, that's something. Series Created by EvelioandZgroup. I have permission to use it, JS.
1. S1E1: The Girl

**Hello, this is Jamie Skyland. I was wondering around some files through here, and I saw this "episode" from a series Evelio wrote (I read it sue me for snooping around) and I found it smart and funny. What was more funny was it was series that _didn't_ give readers what they want. People want Gumball with some girl and a happy ending. This doesn't give it. In fact, it's a series that doesn't any question you would ask about the series. For example, you would ask if Gumball and Carrie would be a thing, or with Penny. Would Darwin be with someone he love for the rest of his life? It doesn't answer it, but it offers "nothing!" The best thing I know for comedy is here. I asked Evelio if he would be okay to put it up. He was okay with it, and now here it is: A show about nothing. Now that's something. Enjoy!**

**P.S. This isn't the return of EvelioandZgroup. He's not on the site for reasons, so don't start jumping to conclusions. **

* * *

Gumball

Series Created by EvelioandZgroup

Written By EvelioandZgroup

Story By EvelioandZgroup

**COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER: The characters involved in the series are property of Ben Bocquelet. Any appearance from OCs belong to their respective owners. The plots used are original and if similarities to person, place, among the living or dead they are purely coincidental. The plots belong to writer(s).**

**Season 1 Episode 1: The Girl**

* * *

Gumball and Darwin were sitting at an empty bunch table. They weren't eating anything, but were among themselves a conversation between each other.

"I don't understand this," Darwin said, confused. "Why the sudden change in everything?"

"It's simple, Darwin," Gumball said. "Everything that's happen to me, has always been due to my instinct, which was wrong. If I want to be with someone, it might not work out. Now, think about this: What if I try something new, like being a _new_ Gumball."

"A _new_ Gumball?...You would be replacing something that would be whiny, irresponsible, moron, shy, caring, and a failure, with someone who is smart, responsible, tough, confident, funny, and womanizing success?"

"Well, if that's your way of not trying to offend me with insults as compliments, then yes, it is."

"But how will you pull it off?"

"I don't know."

At that moment, Gumball looked up and saw someone who looked familiar.

"Hey, Darwin, does she look familiar?" Gumball pointing to the person.

Darwin checked the person out, and she did look familiar. She was Rachel.

"Dude, that's Rachel."

"The girl from the party?"

"Yeah."

"Huh, I always thought her name was Penelope."

Darwin was confused.

"How could you not know her?"

"How could I? No one ever told me her name. You expect me to know who she is, just because of a party? That's like calling someone after a one night stand."

"A one night stand? What's that?"

"I don't know, but it felt right to say. Maybe I'm watching too many sitcoms late at night."

"Maybe you are."

"Hey, why don't we ask her to sit with us."

"_Sit_ with us? Gumball, she's 15 and wouldn't hang out with us!"

"Why not? She kissed you. Remember, vacuum cleaner?"

"Well - "

"Hey, Ramona!" Gumball yelled to Rachel, who turned and saw Gumball.

"Me?" Rachel pointing to herself.

"Yeah, you. Why don't you sit with us?"

Rachel didn't talk, didn't stop, but she walked over to them and sat next to Darwin. They both took quick glances at each other. They quickly put their attention towards Gumball.

"So tell me, Jenny - "

"My name is Rachel."

"I know, but I feel we shouldn't be labeled by our names."

Rachel clarified, a bit confused as well, "So you want to be called by something else instead of the name your mom and dad gave you?"

"Why not?"

"Huh."

"Well, let me ask you this: Why are you here?"

Rachel stood quiet for a moment and looked around.

"Come on," Darwin said. "We're your friends."

"Except me," Gumball said, "I don't know you."

Rachel felt a bit hurt. "But I know your brother."

"No, you don't. You just kissed him on his cheek after he helped you clean up the mess you made at the party - how'd that turn out?"

"Well, I got grounded after they found a hairy mole thing and a monkey in the closet. They were making out, and I got grounded for letting in animals in the house."

"Why does that sound familiar?"

"Maybe they were uninvited people," Darwin said.

"_Right_," Gumball said. "How could the uninvited guest get to a party, hosted by a 15 year old girl, only to have it be filled with middle school students?"

"Maybe they were Miss. Simian and Principal Brown."

"Could be. After all, they are old and lonely and so desperately hate me and everyone else they come into contact with."

"So, what's your point in all of this?" asked Rachel.

"Nothing," he replied. "Absolutely nothing." Putting both of his arms out there and making it clear of his point: nothing.

"Huh."

"Yeah," Darwin said. "It's his new way of being a new Gumball."

"Is it?"

"No, but he did say he was going to be the opposite of who he was."

"So, Rachel," Gumball said, "why are you here, anyway?"

"Do you really want to know why I'm here, Gumball?"

"No, but it makes interesting conversation and - "

"It's basically you being opposite because you have no interest in me, what so ever."

"Exactly."

"Well, it turned out that I failed the big test, and my parents thought that maybe I wasn't mature enough to go on as a high schooler. They didn't want to put me in special ed - no offense, Darwin." Darwin was already confused as it is. "So they thought they should put me back and see if I can relearn everything I was taught in school."

"All the way to 7th grade?" Gumball asked.

"Actually to the 6th grade, but that's not the point."

"So, you've been demoted 4 years - "

"5 years, actually."

"5 years, then, from school, all because of one party and a big test?"

"Yeah," Rachel said.

"Well, that's strange. Imagine if I was a cartoon show and had fans write me up in dumb scenarios like me fighting against an evil force, or me being in the FBI, or me with someone I barely have any contact, or even things that don't make sense to begin with."

They all thought about it, and, yeah, it was dumb - it _is_ dumb.

"Gumball, but if they were your fans, give them some credit," Darwin said.

"Would you like it if someone wrote a story about you and me as a couple?"

Darwin stood silent for a moment. "Now, that's just crazy."

"I know."

"Hey," Rachel said, "but, that doesn't mean you can hate them."

"What if they put me and you as a couple?" Gumball asked.

Rachel stood silent. "Now, _that's_ just crazy."

"You see what I mean - I can't go around and be someone I'm not."

"Surprisingly you don't," Darwin said.

Gumball turned to him, "What do you mean?"

"Well, you don't stay true to yourself. Right now, you want to be the opposite of who you are, just because."

"Well, there's nothing wrong with it. That would even mean I could go out with any girl, as I please."

Rachel and Darwin started laughing.

"_You_?" Rachel said. "How would that even happen? Darwin has a better chance of getting the girl he likes than you."

"Oh, is that right?" Gumball said, intimidatingly. "Darwin, who do you like?"

"Uh..."

"Go on, Darwin," Rachel said.

"Yes, Darwin," Gumball said, "'go on, Darwin.'"

"Well...I would have to say Carrie."

"Carrie?" Gumball said, "You don't have anything in common with her."

"Oh, yeah," Darwin said, "like what?"

Gumball made an expression on his face, "She's dead!"

"And?"

"You're a fish!"

"And?"

"The only thing you two have in common is the fact you don't have any bones."

"Do teeth count?"

Gumball did his expression again. "She doesn't even have teeth to begin with."

"No! No, as a bone part. If it does count that we don't have anything in common."

"Come on - "

"Wait a second," Rachel hauled, "What about Penny? You don't have anything in common with her."

"Yeah, so?"

"Why should you go on liking her, thinking you have a better chance than anyone else?"

"I don't. I don't like Penny anymore."

The two were shocked. Darwin didn't expect this. Rachel didn't even expect this, prior to the fact that she saw Gumball and Penny's 2nd kiss attempt, but didn't prevail. She thought he was a dork, but even Penny said he's a dream. How could you argue about young love (beside all the bad examples)?

"What!?" Darwin finally said, after a moment of silence. "Why?"

"Like I said, I have to be opposite. So far, I don't miss her."

"Of course not, she's right across the lunchroom from you," Rachel said, pointing her out, sitting with Carmen, Teri, and Molly.

"Yeah. She's like a thousand light years away," Gumball said, stretching out his arms, which grew tired after being a bit inactive.

"Come on, Gumball," Darwin said. "You still like, like Penny."

"No, I don't."

"Yes, you do."

"No, I don't."

"_Yes_, you do." Darwin grows a bit agitated.

"No, I'll prove it to you." Gumball got up from his chair and walked across the lunchroom, not bothered by anyone or anything (believe me, there's a lot of things we don't know about this place). He didn't hesitate, nor shudder. He went up to Penny, and said, "Hey, Penny."

Penny looked up and saw Gumball, and said, with a smile, "Hey, Gumball."

"Could you move a little bit? I want to talk to Carrie." Confused and unsure what he was doing, she moved a little bit over.

Gumball sat on the opposite side of the table, because Carrie was behind Penny's table.

"Hey, Carrie."

She looked over and saw Gumball. She didn't have any reaction.

"Hey, Gumball," said Carrie, as dead as she can (no pun intended).

"Look, I don't know you well, but you don't know me well, either. You're the girl who has spent the most time with me. So, I was wondering if you wanted to go out on a date."

Everybody, every single thing that was around the area, who heard the talk either choked on their lunch or spit out their milk or juice.

Carrie was a bit surprised, and actually shy.

"Really? Uh...yeah, sure."

That did it.

Someone yelled, screaming out the lunchroom, "_It's the apocalypse!_"

"Great," Gumball said, with a smile, "I'll pick you up at 8. Sound good?"

"Alright with me."

"Good." Gumball turned to Penny, and said, "Thanks for lending me this spot, Penny. I really appreciate it."

Gumball got up and went back to his original lunch table.

Darwin and Rachel were shocked enough for what just happened.

"What the what?" Rachel said. "Why did you do that?"

"Well, Darwin wasn't going to do that. I saw an opportunity, and I took it. Plus, I proved my point: I don't like Penny, anymore."

"Gumball," Darwin said, in a serious voice, "I'm not upset you asked her out. But, you did it, right in _front_ of _Penny_. Don't you think she will be heartbroken?"

"I don't know."

"I think I hate the new you, Gumball," Rachel said.

"Live it, love it, never leave it."

* * *

Penny was at Teri's house. The two were up at her room, discussing what happened at lunch.

"Why?" Penny said, on Teri's bed, with her head down on the edge. "Why did he do that?"

Teri wasn't paying too much attention. She was busying put on bug spray around the room, along with the anti-bug spray and germ repellent.

"How could Gumball do that? I thought we had a connection between each other."

"Penny," Teri said, putting on latex gloves, "maybe Gumball's going through a phase. He's going to be doing dumb stuff. That's what all boys do. They laugh at you, call you names, trick you...eventually ditching you that one night at the restaurant when you wanted him to meet your parents - _you selfish jerk! _- "

"TERI!" Penny screamed, trying to get her back into focus. "Look, I don't know why he would do that. Especially with _her_. What does she have that _I _don't?"

"Penny, aren't you suppose to be the sweet and open-minded one? You're kind of becoming jealous and envious...if I knew what "envy" means."

"Well..."

"Well, what?"

"This doesn't count. I mean, would you like it if the boy of your dreams starts dating another girl and you start showing a bit of your other side?"

"I guess."

"But...why her? _Her_!? Why does he like her?"

"Maybe he wants to experiment."

"On a _dead_ girl?"

"Well...we have _a lot_ of different people here. Nobody's the same in anyway."

"But, why? Why not me? Please, Teri...I have to have someone's opinion."

"Are you just saying that, or you really want my opinion? Because that has been used so many times that it literally has no meaning anymore."

"I...I don't know. Now, since you said that, I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or that I'm having a bad week and I'm going crazy."

"I'd go with the first one, but, maybe, both, as well."

"Thanks for that," Penny said, sarcastically.

"Well, maybe because he has a close connection with her."

"He just said that they both don't know each other!"

"Yeah, but he also said that she's the girl that he's spend the most time with. Think about it Penny - when was the last time you guys ever talked or hanged out?"

"Well..."

"Exactly. Plus, if that doesn't work out, whose to say he won't go to another girl."

That got under Penny's shell.

"What do you mean _another_ **girl**?"

"Uh...I...whose to say that he _might_ experiment on someone _else_?"

Penny lost it. She was about to leave Teri's room until she said, "Wait! Don't do anything you might regret."

"Okay, fine, whatever."

"Good," Teri said, finally having her protect-me-from-germs suit on. "Now, give me a hug before you."

"Don't you think - "

"That what? That I take this germ thing too far? Is that what you're saying?!"

"No. No, that you want to hug me, since you could get hurt by that?"

"But, you are my friend, that's an exception. Now, give me the hug or I'll change my mind about it."

Penny went over to hug her, but the suit that supported her squished too quick - it grew like a balloon and was about to pop.

"_Okay, take it easy!_"

* * *

Gumball was walking towards the graveyard, looking for Carrie.

"Carrie? Carrie, where are you?" Gumball said, looking around each tombstone. He found one in particular that was appealing. It said:

_Here lies Phil Barker. _

_He died doing what he loved._

"Hmm, what did he do?" He wiped some of the dust off the bottom of the tombstone and found out what he did.

_1914 Hot-Dog Eating Champion. Record Breaking 241 Hot-Dogs._

"Well, that explained the cause of death." Gumball continued on searching for Carrie.

"CARRIE!" he yelled, from the top of his lungs. Eventually, he woke up some of the ghost around, and they yelled at him, telling him to shut up. But, soon came out Carrie, emerging from the fog.

"Hey, there, Carrie."

"What are you doing?"

"Picking you up."

"I don't know live in the graveyard."

"Well, I just assumed, since you're dead and all."

"I live in the abandon house, right across the graveyard."

"Ooooohhh. Well, that was my second choice."

* * *

Darwin was all alone, doing nothing. He was flipping through the channels.

"Man, it's so boring here," Darwin said, reaching his hand out to a bowl of spaghetti, with the note from everyone else, saying:

_Hey, I'm working late tonight. Be back late ~ Mom_

_2 lazy 2 rite rite free food! be back wen i pas out. Buy ~ Dad_

_I'm not here. Anais._

"What am I suppose to do for the rest of the night?"

* * *

Penny was all alone in her room, watching some lame teen dramas that she even believes is stupid. She thought about the fact they had a series about melodramatic vampires. Now, they have a show about a group of complaining teens. She thought it looked familiar.

Her phone was ringing. She picked it up and answered.

"Hello?" Penny asked.

"Hey, Penny," Darwin said, with enthusiasm. "What's going on?"

"Darwin? How did you get my number?"

"I don't know. That social site where you put up your information."

"What do you want?"

"Nothing. I'm just calling, bored since Gumball went to movies with Carrie at the south side of town and - "

"Wait! Gumball's at the Plaz _with Carrie_?!"

"Yeah, that's what he said. So, anyway - "

"I gotta go, Darwin, bye." Penny couldn't have said it fast enough. She ran out the door and went down to Gumball's date.

Darwin was left with a dial tone that the phone does.

"Hello. Is anyone there?"

A moment of silence was endured.

"I'm so lonely."

* * *

Gumball and Carrie were just watching some of the previews.

The two weren't talking, just watching.

Two boys eventually passed them, but bump right through Carrie. She was a bit mad by that.

"Did you see that?" she said.

"What?" he said.

"That guy just bumped right through me."

"But, you're dead. He can't physically touch."

"That's not the point, it's the principle: you can't bump through someone without saying sorry."

"So, what do you want me to do?"

"Tell him to say he's sorry."

"Alright." He got and shouted to the two. "Hey, buddy! You just bumped into my date. Apologize to the lady."

"Why? She's dead. I can't even touch her."

"I'm with you on that, but it's the principle."

"It doesn't count. _She's_ dead."

"It's the principle. Either way, you can't bump into someone."

"It doesn't count."

"_Yes, it does because it's the principle!_"

"Look: Hey, people!" They all turned around to him since he called to them. "Does the principle count for being rude when you can't necessarily touch the person since they're a ghost, so you didn't touch or bump through them, but rather right through the dead?"

That unleashed mayhem - people were now in a debate club against the idea about getting people to say it is rude, no matter if they're dead since it still bothers them. But, they also say they can't touch. So, the rule doesn't imply since it only counts if you bump into someone and you notice it enough to say sorry. Except for one person, who said she liked the actor in the screen, since she says he's a good actor. Eventually, they got into a debate whether or not he should even be considered an actor when they questioned his methods by simply moving his eyes down then up.

Gumball and Carrie left the theater. But, before they did, at the exact same time, Penny came in, rushed to get a ticket.

"I need to get a ticked to the movie!" Penny said, frantically.

"Okay, what's the name of the movie you want to see?"

Penny froze. She didn't know the name of the movie.

* * *

Darwin was back at the house, watching old movies, reruns on the TV, the usual good stuff on TV. Darwin had a can of cheese wiz, putting some on a pickle and eating it.

The phone rang. Darwin rushed through it, spilling everything on the couch. He got to the phone and answered, casually, making sure the person who's calling doesn't think he's desperate.

"Hello."

"Darwin, it's me, Penny. I need to know what movie they're watching."

"Well, look who came calling back."

"Darwin, please, I need to know what movie they went to see."

"Why should I do that for you? You hung up on me and ran off."

"Come on! Just help me, and I'll do whatever you want."

"_Anything _you say?"

"Yes! Just name it, and quickly!"

"I want you to be my friend."

"We are friends."

"No, I mean_ real_ friends. We hang out and do stuff."

"Fine, okay! What's the name of the movie?"

"I don't know. Maybe _The Living Baby_."

"Okay."

* * *

Penny rushed backed to the counter, since it was now empty.

"I need on ticket to _The Living Baby_."

"Okay. That'll be $20."

"_$20!? _But, it's usually $5!"

"Yeah, but we have no more space. Even when you're frantic, you should pay attention to reality."

"If you don't have seats for that movie, why were making me pay extra?"

"Because you're desperate enough to pay anything to get into that theater."

"Fine! Here!" Penny handed her the $20 and ran off to the movie.

She went in and saw people arguing. The movie had started and they were talking. She tried looking for the two since she couldn't hear them. She eventually noticed they were talking about bumping into a ghost, so she went up at the front and yelled, getting everyone's attention.

"Did any of you see a blue cat and a ghost come here?"

One of them said, "You mean the ones that left about 5 minutes ago?"

Penny dropped her arms down when she raised them to get their attention. Her mouth was so wide open that she could have swallowed a handful of flies.

"..._What_?"

"Yeah, they just left when this whole argument began."

"Why didn't you stop when the movie started?"

"It's the principle!"

Penny left, realizing she had spend $20, forced to make a friend, spending all this time for nothing. She walked out, very disappointed.

* * *

Gumball and Carrie were walking down the cemetery (not in it, this time). Gumball and Carrie were talking and having fun.

"I don't understand teenagers," Gumball said, walking with Carrie. "They're the most impressionable, and they buy anything when others start to have it."

"I know," Carrie said. "They're a bunch of mindless consumers. Heck, I don't even wear those ridiculous clothes."

"Because you're dead," Gumball said. He made Carrie laugh. Nobody had every make a reference to her being dead, and delight her enough to laugh about it.

"That's very true."

"Hey, you laughed."

"And?"

"You said, you only feel misery, or something."

"Well, now, I don't."

The two made it to the abandon house across the cemetery.

"You know, Gumball, I can't even remember the last time I had so much fun with someone."

"Me too. It's like we're connected."

"Yeah," Carrie said. She looked into his eyes, "But, we can't go out."

"I know," Gumball said, with a smile.

"...huh? You do? How?" Carrie asked.

"It's simple: if we start dating, then we wouldn't have this connection. We would be so consumed by the idiots that have relationships and we would stop being this way."

"You...actually got it right. I was afraid you might flip."

"Again, you have another emotion." She laughed. "But, if I have you as a girlfriend, then it wouldn't be the same as having you as my best friend."

"I thought Darwin was your best friend."

"Yeah, but you're the best _girl_ friend I have. No one else can compare."

* * *

Penny was just walking back to her house. When, all of a sudden, she felt pain. She felt extreme pain at the moment. So much that she fell on the floor, and she didn't know why.

* * *

Gumball said, with a serious face, "If things don't work out in the future and I'm still single by 30, I just might ask for your hand in marriage."

"I don't know think you should do that."

"Yeah, you're right. After all, you're a ghost and you don't age, as far as I'm concerned."

"And you are right."

The two laughed at it. Gumball said his goodbyes to Carrie and so did she.

* * *

Gumball was on his way home, while Tobias jumped out of the bushes.

"Gumball!" Tobias screamed.

"Yes, that is me."

"What's this I hear that you're sitting with my sister?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because if Rachel starts going out with you, then you two might get married, and that would make us family, with me and Penny!"

"You keep thinking you have a chance with her."

"I have a better chance than you."

"I don't even want to go out with her. But I still have a better chance with her, whether she likes me or not."

"Oh yeah, well, it just so happens_ I_ have the same lunch period as you guys."

"So does everyone else in - "

"Quiet! And I'm going to be sitting with you."

"That's just gonna be embarrassing."

"Why? Because I'm watching over you two, so you don't try anything funny?"

"No, because it's an embarrassment to be near you."

"Well, if you don't have any intention with Rachel, then you shouldn't mind me sitting next to you guys."

"I would still mind it, since I don't want to be seen with you."

"Well, I'm going to do it anyway. _Goodnight, Gumball_."

"_Goodnight, Tobias_." They went their separate ways.

* * *

Darwin had passed out by eating too many pickles, while his mouth had a lot of cheese.

Gumball came and saw Darwin, passed out. He reached over (where his blanket was at) and grabbed the cheese can. He shake it and knew there was none left.

"Why didn't you leave me some?" Gumball said to Darwin, throwing the can in his face, even if he was passed out. Gumball grabbed the remote and turned it off and went up to bed.

* * *

Penny was still on the floor where she had that tremendous pain. She didn't even knew where she had the pain first. She fell over to the floor, as if it were a massive cramp. Penny looked paralyzed on the floor.

The thumbprint guy walked over to her. He stared for a while, then he was curious to see if she was even alive. So, he kicked her. Nothing, so he left.


	2. S1E2: The Project

**Hello, this is Jamie Skyland (go ahead and hate me for still using his account. Evelio said it was okay). I showed Evelio that the series was up. He said that since it was up, he might as well put another one up. And, in his words, if people start showing a liking to the show and the episodes, he may even let me put up some more (including him _writing_ more episodes for the series!). He did say that he would only do an episode each time it gets more than 10 reviews, because he feels like the series isn't worth much, but if it can maintain that time for each episode, he might be interested in continuing. These are his words. I also have to say that we must keep this going since it's actually a good series, and he has more. Please, support it by favorite, follow, and review this story. It means a lot and helps out a lot. You can even review it if you don't have an account. so if you like this story as much as I do, then review on how much you like it. Anyone can review.**

**I would also like to add that I've been following this feud of some sort about this guy for critics. I asked Evelio if it was true, but he said that he would rather answer it on Friday since he will be doing another interview with Bryce. Tune in, I guess. I don't know if he's telling the truth. Thank you, and that is all.**

* * *

Gumball

Series Created by EvelioandZgroup

Written By EvelioandZgroup

Story By EvelioandZgroup

**COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER: The characters involved in the series are property of Ben Bocquelet. Any appearance from OCs belong to their respective owners. The plots used are original and if similarities to person, place, among the living or dead they are purely coincidental. The plots belong to writer(s).**

**Season 1 Episode 2: The Project**

* * *

Gumball, Darwin, Rachel, _and_ Tobias were sitting at the lunch table. They were eating lunch; Gumball had a chicken sandwich, Darwin had a lunchbox with the Daisy the Donkey logo on it, Rachel with pepperoni pizza, and Tobias with a can of soda. He was just sipping through a straw, watching Gumball, not letting a single second away. Tobias wasn't even blinking.

"You know, I don't think we should have lunch periods," Gumball said.

"Why?" Rachel said, questioning it.

"Well, it's simple: If we keep having lunch periods, then we would be wasting extra time that could be used on getting out early and having food we actually like."

They all thought about it. "Gumball," Darwin began, "that just might be the smartest thing anyone has ever said."

"No, it isn't," Tobias said, immediately.

"How come?" Gumball replied.

"Well, for one, it came out of your mouth."

"So what? If I knew a way to end world hunger and if I said, then it would automatically be considered a bad idea, just because it came from me?"

"Yeah."

"You sir - or _thing_, maybe - are selfish and ignorant."

"So?"

"You would let starving children die, because you don't want to go with my idea to make them not hungry, just because you don't like me?"

"Yeah," Tobias said. "What have you done that proves your intelligent?"

"I've done more than you."

"Like what?"

"Well, for starters, I haven't got rejected by asking a girl out."

"You only asked one!" Darwin said, "And it didn't even end with you two becoming a couple."

"_But_, hear me out, she said _yes_ to my offer," Gumball said. "So, in conclusion, I have a 100% not-getting-turned-down-by-a-girl rate."

Darwin thought about it, along with Tobias. "Darn!" they both said at the same time.

Gumball got up, finishing up his sandwich, "I got to throw this in the trash can."

Tobias yelled, "When you do, don't come back, if you know what's good for you!"

Gumball walked to the end of the lunchroom to get to the trash can. When he threw it out, he said, "Why do they put these things so far away?" At the same time, he bumped into a girl, spilling her milk on her.

"Oh! Oh, I'm very sorry," Gumball said, with care.

"Don't be sorry for me, baby blue," she began. "You think you can go up and trash someone's lunch.

Gumball made an expression. "You were only holding milk!"

"Yeah," she said, angrier, "_that_ was my lunch, you _jerk_."

"Well, at least I apologized and not yell out, you _monkey_!"

"Why, because I have a tail?"

"Yeah!"

"You have a tail, too!" she pointed out.

"Well, at least I know what I _am_! Unlike you, you hybrid."

"I prefer the term 'mix and match,' dummy."

"And I prefer if you don't start yelling out and being a 3-D, ginger hair, toad colored, yuppie, tomboy, hybrid!"

"Well, this has been a pleasure of meeting you," she said, sarcastically.

"You too! I'm Gumball! What's your name, if you even have one!?"

"I do, it's Jamie, and what kind of name is Gumball? Is that for people to _chew_ and _spit_ you out?"

"Well, at least I'm not confused of being something else!"

"Well, at least _I'm_ not a high pitched, rag wearing, no shoes, bald idiot!"

"Oh, is that how you think of _me_!?"

"Yeah!" Jamie said, finishing it off. Gumball stood there, mad, but then grew a smile, laughing. Eventually, she did it as well. The two were laughing at what they called each other.

"That's pretty funny," he said.

"Yours too," she said. "Now, how about you walk right out of here before I start laughing at your death."

"Fine! I'll see you later."

"Bye!"

"Bye!"

The two left angry at each other. Gumball went over to his seat.

* * *

In Miss Simian's class, everyone was forced to pay attention to her. Nobody wanted to, but, in life, we always do things we don't want to.

"Today, class, we're going to be watching my vacation slides with _Nigel_ in Paris."

Everyone was disgusted by it, most of all Gumball. "Come on, we have better things to do!"

"Like what?"

"No watching this! Give me the electric chair and end my misery."

Miss Simian walked over to his desk, "Watch it, Watterson, you just might get what you wished for." She went back to her desk and pulled out her projector and pulled down the white screen.

Penny asked, "How did you guys get money to go to Paris?"

Simian replied, "We used the money from the school fun fair. You say anything, I'll send your parents what's left of your shell."

Penny remained silent, and terrified.

Miss Simian got it up and running and started the slide show. It ran for a full hour, but to everyone else it was the longest hour of their life.

* * *

Mr. Robinson was walking down the street, minding his own business. When all of a sudden he found a $20 bill. He looked around, making sure no one was around. He took it and went off.

* * *

"And here is me and Nigel at the Eiffel Tower," Miss Simian said, giving her feelings out in one sound (or just an _aw! _noise). "Isn't it romantic?"

Gumball yelled, "No!"

Miss Simian said, "Shut up, or fail!"

He was now quiet.

"And, that's the end of the show." Miss Simian went over to the light switch and turned it on and saw that most of the class was now dead. They died of boredom. That was until Miss Simian yelled out free ice scream. Everyone woke up, but she end it with a _Not! _and started laughing evilly.

"Now, I know it's the weekend, and we all want to leave - "

"What was your first clue?" Tobias yelled. She didn't say anything, but grabbed a nearby chalk eraser and threw it at him. It had so much chalk that it gave Tobias a fog around his whole body. He had officially turned white.

"But I must give you an over excessive project now, so I don't have to do anymore work in the summer."

"Wait!" Gumball said. "So, you're giving us a big assignment, that was suppose to be done at the end of the school year, just because you don't want to do any work at the end of the summer?"

"Yes. That sums it up about right."

"I hope you realized that you sounded like me, Miss Simian," Tobias said. Miss Simian grabbed another chalk eraser and said, "Quiet you!" and threw it to his face, again. The only difference this time was now he had swallowed some of the chalk dust.

"So, here it is: Work one day with someone and act as if you were a married couple. You will have to stay in contact with them for 24 hours, report how you encounter problems and solved them, and any kind of tips on how to survive a future marriage."

"That's the project?" Gumball asked, confused by it, along with everyone else.

"Yes, Gumball. They're making me do the project to prevent future divorces since they just convinced the town that it involves too much work and doesn't settle well for both sides."

Miss Simian went by her desk, pulled open the drawer, which contained a rotten apple, a picture of the principal, a picture of Gumball with his eyes scratched out, 3 darts, and a hat with small strips of paper. She pulled out the hat, "So, I want the boys to come up and pick a name out of the hat. Also, I must add that if a boy gets paired up with a boy and a girl gets paired up with a girl - "

"You mean 'same sex pairing'?" Tobias quoted. Again he got throw a chalk eraser.

"You will have to work with them nonetheless since they believe _same sex_ couples will get married in the future. Okay, first up, Alan." Alan went up and stared at the hat. "Pick a name, Alan."

"I have no hands!" Alan shook his strong to prove his point.

"Fine, I'll pick for you." Miss Simian reached into the hat and pulled out a name. "Ah, you got paired up with" - looking at the class for reassurance - "Sussie!"

Alan looked at Sussie; she smiled while drool came out of her. He slowly turned to Miss Simian, saying, _Ah naw_, in a cheap and squirmy voice as if he pressed his chin to his neck to make that sound (if he had a chin _and_ a neck to begin with).

"Next, is - "

"Can I get someone else?"

"NO! Sit back down with your wife!" He went over to his desk, which was coincidentally next to Sussie; again, she drooled all over the desk.

"Next, Anton." He got up and went to Miss Simian. She just looked at him, while he was looking up, clearly showing he couldn't reach the hat.

She looked down, "What?"

"I can't reach!"

"Fine, I'll put the hat down," she said, as she lowered it down to the ground. Anton was about to get one, but she started to raise it and lower it like if it was a pinata, saying that he had to jump higher. Eventually (thankfully!) he got one.

"William?"

"Aw! Don't you two _boys_ make a cute couple."

"I can't even fly! How do you expect for me to even be in a picture with him?"

"I don't know. Maybe, _a chair_!" She started to laugh evilly, again.

"Actually, that was the most help you've given all year. You _actually_ did a good thing!"

She started to think about it, and, yeah, she _did_ do a good thing.

"Get out of my face before I hold you back a year like Jamie!"

At that moment, Gumball got nervous. He looked around and saw that she was indeed in this room. "Man, why do they always put people here?"

"Next up is...Banana Joe." He went up and was able to jump on the desk and grab a name. He looked at the name.

"I got...myself." He laughed at his own embarrassment. "What do we do if we get ourselves?"

"Then you're going to have a _long,_ lonely life."

"Oh," he said, then he laughed saying, "Easy A! And more food for me!"

Miss Simian thought about it, and it _would_ be an Easy A. Would.

"On second thought, how about you report back to me about how lonely it is to be by yourself."

"That sounds depressing."

"Too bad, loser. Do it or fail, as a loner either way."

"I fail to see the humor in this."

"Just leave," she said, as he went back to his desk. "Next will be...Darwin!" He got up, scared a bit by Miss Simian. He went up and picked out, with his eyes closed, and got a name. He looked at it.

"What do you got, house pet?"

A moment of silence was endured, until he said, "I got Penny."

Everyone around was shocked, Penny the most. Gumball ignored it, by saying, "Does anyone how much time we leave? I can't read from afar."

"Take your seat," she said to Darwin," and you," to Gumball, "shut up, unless spoken to."

Darwin went to his desk, afraid of looking at Penny, he kept all eye contact away. The bad side of this was he bumped into a couple of the desks around.

"Next is - "

"Wait," yelled out Clayton, "you forgot me!"

"Well, you barely do anything in this class, so am I suppose to remember your name?"

"You remember Gumball's."

"Yes, because I hate him. You? I don't know you."

"Well, that's insulting."

"Just get over here and pick the name from this ugly hat, loser!" Clayton got out and went to the hat. He morphed himself to get to the top of the hate and picked out a name with his mouth. He spit it out and looked at the name he had.

"Bobert."

"I think I should have counted how many girls are in here since I think they're more boys than girls."

"_Yaw think!?_" Tobias yelled out. He, again, got thrown an eraser.

"Next we have Gumball." He wasn't nervous as much. He could care less, but two things worried him, though. One of those things was he could actually pick a boy. He can't honestly go along with that. Second, is getting picked by either Penny...or Jamie. Penny isn't a person he wants to associate with. He basically taunted her in public, and it didn't bother him much. But if she is with him, it might act like an actual marriage. She would act like they were the perfect couple, but that scenario would only work if she likes him. He doesn't know for sure, so that doesn't worry him. The real problem is ending up with her. He can't possible predict what would happen.

Gumball went towards the hate, closed his eyes, thinking _Please, not with Jamie_, and grabbed a name. He looked over the piece of paper and saw the name given: Jamie.

He went back to his desk, while Miss Simian yelled out: "Who's your the _man_ in the relationship, Gumball?"

He paused. "Jamie."

Everyone stood silent. Nobody had expected him to get _her_. But the one who's more disappointed is Penny. She really thought she was going to get Gumball. Instead she gets Darwin. _Isn't that a kick in the face_, thought Penny.

Gumball was at his desk, closed his eyes, breathed in and out for three times, and then slapped his hands. He was just watching, just for now.

"Next, we have Teri." Teri went up and walked, shyly. She walked towards Miss Simian, frighten. She looked inside of the hat and saw what she felt was a stab in the heart.

"_This is paper!_" Teri screamed, having both hands to her mouth.

"Yes. It is - it's the very thing that we use everyday."

"But, _I'm_ paper."

Miss Simian leaned in closer: "_Yaw think?_"

"But I love _nature_! I can't be involved in this..._barbaric_ act of insanity."

Miss Simian paused. "Just pick a name, or I'll send you to the loony bin."

Teri reached out for name, but then suddenly, she screamed. "I got a paper-cut!"

"You're paper."

Out from the audience (or classmates), "Does nature _love_ you?" Tobias immediately flinched when Miss Simian didn't even reach out for an eraser. She didn't. Instead, almost everyone wanted to, she laughed.

"Now that's funny," Miss Simian said, laughing _with_ Tobias, instead at him. Tobias even started to laugh. Not a laugh that is from a funny clip, but one that works up to it when you feel uncomfortable and don't really understand why the person is laughing when you expected for them to do something else. Eventually they laughed together, until Miss Simian told him to shut up. He did, but with a straight face (and, obviously, still covered in chalk dust, looking all white).

Teri picked out, again, and got a name. Her reaction: Confused.

"Who'd you get?" Miss Simian asked, as if she cared.

"I got Darwin."

"Say _what_ now?" Darwin said, confused as Teri. There had to be a rule against this. A person can't have two wives at the same time. No, she can't allow this.

"I'm sorry, but we have a policy to not discriminate religions," Miss Simian said, with fake pity.

"What does this have to do with religion?"

"Some religions have multiple wives and we can't go back on our word to let religion and freedom be free," Miss Simian said, with pride (or so they thought).

"Can't I just pick out another name?" Teri asked.

"No."

"Why?"

"We can't go back on our words, and because I don't really care who you get, just as long as we get this project done, so I can have a good vacation this summer."

"How far are you going just to have a good vacation?"

"To do as much work as I possibly can so I won't have to do work in the summer."

"Wouldn't it be easier to just have have assigned us partners, instead of causing more problems?"

Miss Simian paused for a moment. She didn't thought about that. No use going back. _Onward! _she thought. "Just go back to your husband, before he decides to get to the other one first."

Teri walked back, disappoint d by this decision. Gumball saw that this isn't right, but thought about something.

He got up, and said, "But, Miss Simian, if you allow this, you're basically telling Penny, Teri, and Jamie to stay at my house. Don't you think that would cause some tension between us?"

"Hmm, let me think..._NO!_" That really got to Gumball. But she said something else that crawled under his skin: "You better hope nobody else becomes a part of your family's house.

"_Tobias, you're up!_" Miss Simian screamed. Tobias had his ears hurt, already enough being thrown a couple of chalk erasers.

"Why are you yelling?" Tobias asked, hurt enough by the ears.

"Because the only way of anyone getting your attention is to scream at you - you're probably used to it."_  
_

"Not really."

"Just get up here and pick a name."

Tobias, all in white, went over to the hat. He reached in and looked at what he got. He looked at the name and was a bit surprised.

"Whatcha got now, _white-boy_?"

"I got Carrie." Everyone wanted to be surprised, but since it was Tobias, they didn't seem to have much of a reaction to it.

"I guess the _death_ to _you_ part already expired with her," Miss Simian said, with a pun-in-a-pun. Everyone laughed. They found it funny, except for Gumball since he was still shocked at what will happen this weekend.

"Well - hey, where is Carrie?" Tobias asked, realized that he was the only white thing in the room.

* * *

Carrie was in the girls' bathroom. She was floating over a toilet, behind the stalls, locked. A girl came in, while she just stood there. When the girl saw someone watching from behind the stalls, they thought it was a boy and being perverted.

"_Ah! Peeping Tom!_" she screamed and threw a nearby roll of toilet paper they leave by the sinks.

Carrie was thrown it, but had no effect. Before she knew it, Carrie was sleeping. How? Because she woke up and asked where she was with sleepy eyes. After all, the girl from outside did see an _eye_, but how were they suppose to know the only person in this town who sleeps with their eyes open was thought to be a boy getting a good look at the ganders (strange at a young age to spy on, even if they were 12).

* * *

"I don't know," Miss Simian said.

Penny raised her hand: "Didn't you gave her a bathroom pass about an hour ago?"

"Are you insulting my memory, _little peanut_?"

"No, I ju - "

"You better hope you do your project, 'cause if not, you will be forced to repeat 7th grade!"

"Wait!" Gumball yelled. "You're forcing us to do a project that isn't relevant till summer."

"Yeah, so? I'm the teacher - I can do what I want."

"But school regulations doesn't allow teachers to force students' assignments earlier to the date it is due. That would be against the law!"

His classmates were now curious on how did Gumball know that. Darwin asked him.

"I got bored, so I wanted to see if there anything against the school rules about stalking."

"Stalking?" Darwin asked. "Who's gonna stalk you?"

"You never know," Gumball said, "you never know."

"_Well_," Miss Simian replied, "if you do go along with it, I can absolutely make sure you _all_ don't have a summer vacation _and_ breaks, or even days off (including half days)."

"You can't do that!" Darwin yelled.

"Oh, but there's more - I will also post up those videos I _took away_" - making clear notion on the expression - "and post all of them up, having you all expelled!"

"So your plan to prevent us from blackmailing _you_ is for you to blackmail _us?_ Clever." Gumball was not at all surprised for that, but with the combination of both threats will all go towards them - the videos will be placed on them for recording it and they would not get any days off when she could easily use it against them and make them do what ever she wants.

"Now, if we are all on agreement - and I doubt you won't - I will pick for Carrie." She reached into the hat and picked out a name. "Carrie will be with Penny."

"Ah, give me a break!" Darwin yelled, knowing he liked her and everything else will just be chaos.

"Doesn't seem that bad," Gumball said, "Carrie doesn't eat, so it's almost as if she's not there."

Penny leaned in closer to talk to Gumball: "But she's bring Tobias, who has a wife named _Carrie_."

Gumball realized what she meant. Tobias would actually be going to his house. He fell to the floor (first getting out of chair, of course) and screamed _No!_ over and over again.

* * *

Carrie was sleeping again in the stalls and heard someone screaming. She woke up, nearly scared to death since no one can screamed like that.

She looked around and still heard Gumball screaming. "Must be close to a mental hospital." Again she heard the scream. "_Really_ close."

* * *

Gumball slammed his face to the floor and nearly wept in the most whiniest voice known to voice.

"You better get your face out of the floor," - Gumball raised his head up - "the janitor doesn't clean it."

Terrified, Gumball jumped right back and looked at himself as if he seen a beast and had killed someone important. He screamed: "_I've been infected!_"

"Quiet down, Shirley," Miss Simian said. "We still others to go."

And so she did, starting next with Tina. She went over, nearly causing others to fall out of their desk (including one when she turn, she knock him out with her tail and caused him to crash towards the window). Tina tried to reach for the hat, but her arms were long enough to pick them out. Instead of helping, Miss Simian just taunted her. She raised the hat up, but put it down before she had a chance to even get to it. With her head unable to look down from its size, she couldn't tell if she was causing her to not get one. Finally, she did it.

"Who'd you get, small fry," Miss Simian said, though Tina didn't understand the reference. To make matters worse, she couldn't even look down and check the name.

"_Could you read it to me?_" Tina said, in her massive deep voice. Miss Simian had the decency do it since she wasn't getting much fun out of taunting her.

She looked down on the note: "You got Hector."

Gumball had some reaction to it: "Well, _that_ would be interesting."

Tina didn't know what he meant. She didn't do anything about it, but when she over-thought, her short temper went out. "_What is that suppose to mean?_"

"You know - you're both tall, single, and - " He paused for a moment, thinking of something that was totally offensive. "You're both tall."

Miss Simian interrupted: "Plus, you both are looking for anyone, so it's better if you two just marry each other."

"_You really think so?_"

"I'm a teacher; my opinion isn't suppose to matter."

"Next, we have _O-cho_." Ocho crawled down the desk (him being a spider and something from an old arcade game), he went over to Miss Simian. He looked at the hat, used his spider ability and shot web to get up. He picked a name by shooting web at it and getting over. Since he couldn't talk, Miss Simian had to say the name.

Miss Simian looked at the name, but was all too confused, as if she never had this student. "_I-da-ho?_"

Gumball laughed: "_Uranus._"

Nobody laughed (except Miss Simian, knowing the reference pretty well), not knowing the reference it was best they didn't understand it.

"Next we have Leslie."

Leslie got up, thought to himself _I'm surprised there's anyone left_, he went over to the hat, still carry his pot with both hands, like they were broken suspenders. He left go of one hand and reached into the hat.

"I got Masami."

Everyone did an expression that made everyone do the sizzling sound. "I feel bad for you," Darwin said.

"Thanks for the heads up," Leslie said, looking over Masami. "No offense."

"What?" Masami said, confused and a bit angry in her voice.

"Nothing!" Leslie couldn't have said it fast enough.

"Next is Jamie," Miss Simian said. Jamie got up and went up to her. She reached into the hat, with her lower the hat since she has some respect for fighting back when she was held back for a year. She picked a name.

"Who'd you get?"

Gumball was already thinking in his mind_, Not me! Not me! Not me! Not me! Not me!_

"I got_ Gummypuss_," Jamie said.

Gumball got up and said, "I hate that name!"

"Why are you standing?" Darwin asked.

Gumball _shh_-ed him: "It ruins the effect."

"Well, I got to call my _hubby_ something." Jamie knew what she was doing. She was intimidating him with those name calls.

"I'm not your hubby, either!"

"Too bad, we're in this till death to us part."

"Or till Monday," Darwin added.

Gumball and Jamie turned to him and said at the same time: "_Shut up, Darwin!_"

Darwin was silent.

"Next we have Carmen." Carmen got up, a bit upset tat she didn't get paired up with Alan. But she went on to the hat and picked out a name.

"Who you gonna poke this time?"

Carmen was a bit mad at the reference of her being a cactus."Juke," she said, angry. She went back to her desk, still upset about not being paired up with Alan.

Molly was the last one, but they're was nobody else. "Miss Simian, I don't have a person to work with," she said, rasing her hand.

Miss Simian was already annoyed by this. "Well then, you will be with Joe, since both of you ain't got nobody, so you two might as well be a couple."

Tobias said, "You used double negative." Again, the chalk eraser.

Gumball said, "I thought you weren't smart?"

* * *

Carrie was sleeping again, but this time was awoken by the bell. She stretched her arms and then realized something.

_I have no_ _bones_, she thought. She just went past the door and went forward.

* * *

Gumball went out first and was still a bit shocked by what's going to happen. Darwin tapped his shoulder and called him out.

"Yeah?" Gumball asked.

"They want to know what we're gonna do?" Gumball looked from behind and noticed Penny, Teri, Tobias, and Jamie there, waiting for an answer.

"Uh - _who wants to have a family weekend at my house?_" in a bit of a sarcastic voice. They didn't react to it, but just stood there. "Party?" Again silent. "Sleepover?" Again..._silent!_ "Give me something, man - I'm doing the work here."

"How about we just go to Gumball's house and just stay there for the weekend and do what we want?" Darwin said, that gave them a bit satisfaction. Although, Gumball wasn't pleased since it was basically the same as having a party.

"Okay, Tobias," Tobias turned to Gumball, "you gotta tell Carrie we're all meeting up at my house for a project, and the weekend, okay?"

"Fine," Tobias said, coughing off some of the chalk dust. "I don't think Miss Simian cleans those erasers - in fact, I think she threw them so the chalk could get off."

"Maybe," Darwin said, "but maybe you should have been quiet."

"Let's meet up at 7, alright?" they all went with it. They left all left, except Tobias who was going to look for Carrie. He turned and there was Carrie. Carrie looked at him, with a disgusted look.

"There you are. Look, we have to work on a project together and Gumball is gonna meet us in his house, okay?"

"Are you trying to make fun of me?" Carrie asked. Tobias knew what she was talking about.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no. This can all be ex - " Tobias was interrupted when Carrie immediately went into Carmen, who was walking down the hallway. She went into her body and, what seemed to be pain, Carrie grabbed Tobias by the neck and locked both lips to his. Their mouths were both open. After a solid ten seconds had past, she got out and went back to her original ghost form. Carmen didn't know what just happened, so she kept walking away. Behind Tobias was Juke. Carmen saw Juke and went off to work on their project.

"So, we have to meet up at Gumball's house at what time?" Carrie asked, not bothered by what happened.

"Seven," Tobias said, letting out the last gaps of air he had when he was French-ed by Carrie.

"Okay, I'll meet you there." Carrie went past him and floated away, leaving Tobias confused and shocked. The only person who saw that was Alan.

* * *

Nearly 3 hours have passed and Gumball had set up everything for any occasion. Gumball was a bit proud of himself for making everything neat.

"Pretty net," Gumball said, "_too_ neat." Gumball opened a bag chips nearby and consumed it all, leaving a couple of chips left on the floor. "Now, I feel better about myself."

Rachel came out from the kitchen. "Oh! Chips!" Gumball screamed. He didn't know Rachel was here. In fact, he doesn't know _how_ she got in.

"What are you doing here?"

"I don't know," Rachel said, picking up the chip that was on the floor and eating it.

"You know that was just on the floor, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"Huh," Gumball said, pausing for a moment. "I like your style."

"Why do you have all this food?"

Out of nowhere the fingerprint guy came in with a spoon, yelling, "_Where's it!?_"

**To Be Continued**


End file.
